Saturday, May 21, 2016

10 Simple Habits Proven to Make You Happier

         

A new survey of 5,000 people has found a strong link between self-acceptance and happiness, despite the fact that it's a habit not frequently practised.

For their survey, they identified ten everyday habits which science has shown can make people happier.The finding comes from a survey carried out by the charity Action for Happiness, in collaboration with Do Something Different.


Saturday, October 24, 2015

The anatomy of procrastination – and how pupils can beat it


Procrastination is more instinctive than you might imagine. The art of avoidance comes from our lower mammalian brain, which is equipped for survival. It's adapted to focus on what we need immediately, making it harder to focus on attention-demanding, longer-term tasks.

For schoolchildren, getting the brain to engage in tasks that are not recognised as valuable survival goals or potential sources of pleasure is even harder. It's not until our 20s that we develop the mature neural networks that override the lower brain's reactive responses. This means that young people may need help resisting distractions to achieve their goals. Here are some ways you can assist your students in breaking through the roadblocks of procrastination.




Tuesday, September 8, 2015

7 Things You Shouldn’t Say to People in Therapy

You may judge, but therapy saved my life.

My best friend and I are constantly playing phone tag. But there's one person who promises to have my undivided attention once a week, no matter what: Dr. R, my therapist.

For the past 2.5 years, we've spent 55 minutes every Tuesday evening together, and for that, I'm grateful.

My adventures in therapy began during my sophomore year in college, when I walked into my campus's mental health center after a close friend suffered a mental breakdown.

4 Ways You're Sabotaging Your Life

We were so alike, I knew that if I didn't do something, my fate would be similar. Now, five years later, I consider that decision the best choice I've ever made.


http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2015/09/01/7-things-you-shouldnt-say-to-people-in-therapy/

Thursday, August 27, 2015

Stress Is Your Brain Trying to Avoid Something

Stress exists in every workplace, and all of us have probably tried a few trendy stress-management approaches. But rather than trying the latest fad, it may be more effective to understand how stress works and where it comes from, so that you can create your own methods for dealing with it.

Stress is an emotional response; like all emotional responses, it emerges from the functioning of the motivational system. Your motivational system engages goals and gives them energy so that you can pursue them. Simply put, when you succeed at your goals, you feel good, and when you don't succeed you feel bad.

Stress is a negative emotion, so the first thing we can see about stress is that it reflects a goal you are not currently achieving.


https://hbr.org/2015/08/stress-is-your-brain-trying-to-avoid-something


Monday, August 24, 2015

What It Really Means to Love Yourself: 3 Aspects of a Deeper Self-Care

We often hear that it's important to love yourself. Sounds good, right? But what does it actually mean to love and care for yourself?

For some people, self-love might mean taking a warm bath or pampering themselves with a massage or manicure, which might help us. Yet, the elusive self-love that we seek requires something deeper.

Self-love means finding peace within ourselves — resting comfortably within the depths of our being. We might find temporary respite by doing something to nurture ourselves. But a deeper inner peace requires cultivating a certain way of being with ourselves — a warm and nurturing attitude toward what we experience in life.

The suggestions that follow are derived from Focusing, developed by Dr. Eugene Gendlin. Sometimes called the Focusing Attitude, this is simply a way of being nonjudgmentally kind, present, and mindful toward whatever we happen to be experiencing.

Gendlin has stated, "The client's attitudes and responses to the felt sense need to be those of a client-centered therapist." In other words, we need to have empathy and unconditional positive regard for whatever we are experiencing inside.

http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2015/08/22/what-it-really-means-to-love-yourself-3-aspects-of-a-deeper-self-care/


Wednesday, August 5, 2015

8 Creative Techniques to Cope with Painful Emotions

Many of us have a hard time coping with negative emotions. This makes sense. "Painful feelings like anxiety, sadness, anger and shame tap into the parts of our brain that are connected to survival," according to Joy Malek, M.S., a licensed marriage and family therapist. For instance, the anger we feel when we're hurt is the same as the flight, fight or freeze response we experience when our survival is seriously threatened, she said.

We also tend to learn very early that getting mad or crying is not OK, said Meredith Janson, MA, LPC, a therapist in private practice in Washington, D.C. who specializes in expressive arts therapy. "As a mother of a toddler myself, I see every day how children can easily become overwhelmed by their feelings of sadness, frustration and anger. There is a temptation to distract the child or to cheer them up in order to make all the 'fuss' stop."

Click to read

Sunday, January 25, 2015

What Suicidal Depression Feels Like

I don't know if you have noticed, but ever since Robin Williams died, I have removed the filter from my writing that keeps me safe of jaw dropping, disappointing head gestures, and all kinds of judgments that authentic writing invites. I just really don't care anymore what people think because lives are at stake.

If this brutal beast of an illness is strong enough to kill someone with the passion, determination, and genius of Robin Williams, than we must do everything we can to protect those who are more fragile. That means being brave and writing as honestly as I can, on a taboo subject so few people understand, even if it means getting disapproving stares from other parents at my kids' school.

When I first heard about Robin's death, my first reaction was this: "The poor guy sneezed."

Click to read

Tuesday, December 30, 2014

Achieving Happiness Despite Everyday Challenges

Learning that you or a loved one has a chronic illness is news you never want to hear. The knowledge of such information is often accompanied by feelings of fear, anger, and depression, which can cause debilitating, unnecessary stress. By understanding more about your condition and adopting a positive outlook on life, you can set the course for a better future.

During my time at Harvard University, I focused on positive psychology, the scientific study of what makes people thrive. Research in the field has found a strong connection between an individual's mindset, social support system and well-being. Recently I have been able to leverage the research behind positive psychology to help people living with multiple sclerosis.

Click to read

Wednesday, November 26, 2014

Does Kindness Kill Creativity?

One of us attended a two-hour creativity workshop in 2011 where the workshop leader spoke about the various stages of creativity. He asked the audience to blurt out words related to their experience when working alone and generating new ideas. They yelled, "excitement," "intrigue," "joy," even "love." Basically, it is pleasurable to conjure up ideas. Next, the workshop leader asked the crowd to identify emotions associated with that next phase of creativity; the part where you share your ideas with the outside world. The crowd hushed and a few timid voices mumbled "fear" and "embarrassment." Thinking about a field of judges evaluating the sweat equity and inspiration that goes into our work feels wrong. What adult has the authority to claim that a kid's crayon drawn meatball-shaped house with watermelon-shaped, purple skinned parents is anything less than creative? If creativity is about originality and usefulness, how can anyone criticize never-before-used rhymes ("I don't like 'em figgity fat, I like 'em stiggity stacked/You wiggity wiggity wack if you ain't got biggity back")? As these MC Hammer lyrics suggest, actually, some ideas are terrible. 

The experience in this workshop reflects a broader pattern in life regarding creativity: people tend to fall in love with their ideas. Research suggests that the easier an idea is to think of, the better and more correct it feels. This is why none of us can accurately judge the creative merits of our own ideas. It is for this reason that creativity requires more than one person. Gifted authors still need editors. The best film directors rely on script supervisors to catch mistakes. Nobel Prize-winning scientists still submit their work to the scrutiny of peer review. The problem emerges in families, schools and societies that promote appreciation, compassion, and kindness over candor. 

Saturday, October 18, 2014

5 Classic Signs of Depression Most People Don’t Recognise

Americans are more depressed now than they have been in decades, even if they don't know it, a new study finds.
Data from 6.9 million adults and adolescents from across the US found that Americans now report more psychosomatic symptoms of depression than similar studies in the 1980s (Twenge, 2014).
Dr. Jean Twenge, the study's author, said:
"Previous studies found that more people have been treated for depression in recent years, but that could be due to more awareness and less stigma.
This study shows an increase in symptoms most people don't even know are connected to depression, which suggests adolescents and adults really are suffering more."
Symptoms of depression that many reported, but which people appeared not to know were signs of depression included: